10 Things No One Told You About Getting Engaged (Oh, P.S. Congrats!)

So, you just got engaged (#BestValentinesEver!). Now what? Before you change your Facebook status, or even read our list of the 10 Things To Do As Soon As You Get Engaged, you absolutely must read our insider guide to getting engaged (when to take that ring off, how to start the planning process, and more).

You can’t wear your ring everywhere.

Now that you’ve got THE ring on your finger, it’s time to learn out how to take care of it — where you can’t wear it, how to clean it, and more. Did you know some household cleaners can make your gemstone dull over time? Yes, way.

Luckily, we’ve rounded up the 10 things you should never do while wearing your ring.

You don’t need to tell everyone right away.

It’s ok to wait 12 hours before texting, e-mailing and Facebooking everyone you know with the exciting news. Take the first few hours for yourselves. Celebrate as a couple, quietly at first — there will be plenty of time to celebrate with friends and family later.

What the “honeymoon phase” is.

Sure, the term was coined to describe the first few months of marriage, but there is also a honeymoon phase of the engagement, too.

It’s the time when you’re just so happy to have the ring, and eachother, and you haven’t started planning or worrying about any logistics of the wedding yet. Cherish this time — soon you’ll be arguing over seating assignments and in-laws.


You will fight — with almost everyone.

This includes your fiance, mother, mother-in-law and pretty much anyone within earshot. And it’s okay, some relationships will be strained: whenever family and money mix, there are bound to be issues and hurt feelings. This is completely normal, so don’t let your first fight with mom shake you up too much.

That you can’t plan a wedding on your own.

Planning a wedding is basically a full-time job — and if you already have one, it can feel like too much sometimes. Plus, planners are experts at brokering deals with vendors, are well-versed in all bridal terminology (wtf is fondant?!) and won’t let emotions get the better of them. Think you can do it on your own? Check our 10 signs you need a wedding planner.

But — there are tons of apps and e-tools to help you get started.

If you don’t have the budget to hire a planner, check out these apps and websites that can help you do everything from write your vows to change your name once you get married. Yep, there’s an app for that!

You don’t have to get married right away

While many brides choose to get married in a year (or less), there is a strong argument for waiting long. First, you’ll have more time to plan your dream wedding or book your dream venue (dates can go fast), plus it takes some of the pressure off. You can actually wait to find your dream dress, instead of hunting it down like a madwoman. Plus, there’s more time to start saving!

You don’t need a million dollar budget to have the wedding of your dreams.

This is my favorite. You don’t need to be an oil heiress to have the wedding you always dreamed of — just look at Kim Kardashian. First, check out our daily sales on everything from your gown to shoes and invitations; then check our Sample Sale Calendar for the latest bridal sample sales; then use Shopstyle to set sale alerts for yourself. If you’re doing your own makeup, consult one of our Ask The Expert columns (also, find tips for taking great photos, doing your own hair, and more).

You don’t have to change your name.

But, if you do — we love online tool Miss Now Mrs for doing so.

It’s not supposed to be fun — but it can be!

Nobody thinks planning a wedding is a breeze — but that doesn’t mean you can’t give yourself a break every once and a while and just enjoy it. When the dust settles, no one will care whether your cake was 5-tiers (or even what the flavor was) — all that will matter is your marriage. Hey — you found Mr. Right, and that is no small accomplishment. Cheers!

Want more tips? Check our our just-engaged starter kit.