Being asked to be the best man in a wedding is a great honor. It shows that your friend or family member holds your relationship in great esteem. You’ve been his go-to guy in life; now he needs you to be his point person during the planning process of the major step he is taking in life. Don’t just assume being the best man is simply a title and only requires your presence on the wedding; instead, help your friend and soon-to-be groom through the most important day of his life by stepping up and fulfilling your duties with competence.
Before the Wedding
- Assist the groom with choosing his and the groomsmen tuxes/suits
- Organize the groomsmen’s fittings
- Organize a bachelor party that’s impossible to forget and traumatic to remember
- Delegate tasks among the groomsmen (the tedious tasks to those who are responsible and easy tasks to those who are not so responsible)
- Organize a gift from the groomsmen to the groom (can be presented at the bachelor party)
- Keep the groomsmen updated with all information and any changes that may occur in regards to the wedding
Shortly Before the Wedding
- Send out a reminder to the groomsmen regarding their attire, accessories, and grooming.
- Be sure to constantly check on the groom to see how you can be of help, ensure he is still sane and is dealing with the stress that comes with wedding planning well, and it helps when you encourage him often.
- Please prepare for your best man speech. Practice with an audience (one person is just fine). You will have everyone’s full attention on the wedding day most especially the couples so be sure not to dawdle, ensure your toast is meaningful and precise.
Rehearsal and Rehearsal Dinner
- Leap to address hassles as they arise, like giving directions to people, who know neither where they are nor how to use Google Maps.
- Not only is it important that you attend the rehearsal dinner, also be sure to pay attention! You may need to help some of the groomsmen remember their places and schedule.
- During the rehearsal dinner give the second toast, after the father of the groom
On the Wedding Day – Before the Ceremony
Your job is to take some weight off the groom’s shoulders. Stand ready to serve as a valet, a body man, and a personal groomer; the most complete best man tool kit would include a lint brush, ahotel sewing kit, a black pen for signing the wedding certificate, backup copies of any original vows, and a pill case stocked with Altoids and beta blockers.
- Assist the groom with getting dressed
- Make sure the groom has whatever he needs for the wedding ceremony, reception, and honeymoon if he plans on leaving the night of the wedding.
- Your duties may involve delivering checks to vendor, so be sure to get any payments from the groom beforehand.
- Ensure the groom arrives to the ceremony on time. Get there at least 30 minutes before the ceremony starts.
- Distribute the boutonnières
- Take charge of the wedding ring(s)
- Make sure all the groomsmen are dressed appropriately
On the Wedding Day – At the Ceremony
- Enter the ceremony with the groom
- Stand up straight by the groom’s side while waiting for the arrival of his bride
- Be sure to have a handkerchief in hand just in case the groom gets teary-eyed
- Hand the groom the ring
- Sign the marriage license as an official witness
- Escort the maid/matron of honor at the end of the ceremony
At the Reception
- Grin and bear it through the photo sessions
- Dance into the venue with the maid/matron of honor
- Act as a host mingle with guests; Make small talk with everyone who seems interesting and when they start being uninteresting, exit the conversation by making a vague reference to your special obligations.
- Deliver your family-friendly toast and raise a glass to the bride. You need a clear head to achieve your purpose of ensuring that the bride and groom have the happiest time possible and raising the general level of the party so hold off on the drinking prior to making your toast.
- If you see the bride or any of her attendants trying to lift a case of wine or anything else heavier than her bouquet, respond by saying, “No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, noooo.”
- Dance with the bride and with the maid of honor (do not grind unless you really feel the need to).
- Quietly delivering underarm deodorant to a groom if he does not leave to change or freshen up during the reception.
- Take charge of gift envelopes to hold until the couple’s return.
- Have the bride and groom’s getaway car (with their luggage stowed away in it) ready to take couple away from the reception.
- When they’re ready to leave, help them make their escape.
Follow these steps and I assure you will be The Greatest Best Man ever lived!